Chav handbag

A friend of mine was on a bus in London recently, when a woman sat down opposite him and proceeded to empty and re-organise her handbag after emptying it on the seat. This is what she took out:

  • A packet of cigarettes
  • A white thong
  • A packet of 3 condoms (extra large)
  • A makeup case with a mirror
  • A mobile phone
  • A tube of zovirax
  • Lipstick
  • A pair of England socks
  • A packet of 3 condoms (small)
  • An oyster card
  • A purse
  • A packet of 12 condoms (regular, extra strength)
  • A pair of navy blue knickers
  • A tube of lubricant
  • A pocket-pack of tissues
  • A pair of latex gloves
  • Eyeliner
  • An England (St George’s cross) vibrator
  • Another packet of cigarettes
  • 3 packs of chewing gum (one of which was nicotine gum)
  • A screwdriver
  • A mirror
  • A toothbrush
  • A selection of business cards (the top one was a taxi company)
  • House keys
  • 2 AA batteries


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